1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

My first dialogue: female sexual education

Discussion in 'Dialogue' started by MunkeeBiznizz, Oct 22, 2012.

  1. MunkeeBiznizz

    MunkeeBiznizz Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was a long time lurker until I finally got an account today. So I decided to try and make you guys happy.

    I got addicted to SDT and always was looking for someone with this dialogue. It's a dialogue which involves a man pretending to be a teacher to teach them sex ed. He teaches them that blowjobs are sex instead of what's actually going on. Don't worry, this isn't supposed to involve children so that means the girl can not look like a child. I'm trying to demote underage sex. >:(

    For this dialogue, try and make the girl look like a school-girl as much as possible.

    Please tell me how I did :)
     

    Attached Files:

  2. pinosante

    pinosante Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    May 9, 2012
    Messages:
    127
    Likes Received:
    0
    Great idea! Love it. You could have a little more lines, but I love the execution!
     
  3. MunkeeBiznizz

    MunkeeBiznizz Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    Wow. I was expected to be hounded by criticism for my first post. Thanks for the positive feedback :)
     
  4. dantethedarkprince

    dantethedarkprince Club Regular Content Creator

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2012
    Messages:
    2,625
    Likes Received:
    58
    Dude that's great work for your first time ;D. Kudos to you.
     
  5. cwking420

    cwking420 Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2012
    Messages:
    118
    Likes Received:
    2
    It's pretty good for a first attempt. Original idea and good writting. On the other hand it is a bit simple. I'm sure you will improve as you work on more dialogues.

    P.S.:I have a suggestion for your next project. How about an advanced class where the girls learn how to do some of the work themselfs(held:false). This will give you practice using commands to switch between held true/false.
     
  6. SeekingOralGirl

    SeekingOralGirl Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2012
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    No bad. It is a little awkward that the coughing and gagging interrupts your dialog since it is supposed to come from the instructor, however. If you reworked it a little, and ask people to dress the girl as the teacher, it would work very well as an instructional demonstration for her class.
     
  7. Kyro

    Kyro Casual Client

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2012
    Messages:
    369
    Likes Received:
    0
    Implying that you can even make them look like a child. It's in anime style so you cant say they look like a child or underage... Plus even the smallest body it is still not really that small and if you give her small breasts then she's just a loli and loli are not children lol. >.>

    But the most important fact is: it just non-realistically drawn pixels, get over it. lol.
     
  8. pinosante

    pinosante Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    May 9, 2012
    Messages:
    127
    Likes Received:
    0
    Yay! Loli-flame war!
     
  9. Hank East

    Hank East Swell Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2012
    Messages:
    539
    Likes Received:
    29
    Oh god no! please, anything but that!
     
  10. Synonymous

    Synonymous Swell Supporter Content Creator

    Joined:
    Jul 23, 2012
    Messages:
    309
    Likes Received:
    22
  11. cwking420

    cwking420 Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    Sep 17, 2012
    Messages:
    118
    Likes Received:
    2
    WTF! That's just creepy.
     
  12. Delev

    Delev Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2012
    Messages:
    86
    Likes Received:
    1
    It's a good dialogue for a first run. I don't see a huge atrocity of the English language, so that's a plus. The only thing that I would suggest is that because this dialogue is to be spoken by the male instructor (Hence: The HIM) after all of your lines you are going to want to add

    Code:
    {"style":"Him"}
    Because what you're saying in your dialogue is that all of your lines are supposed to be spoken by the Him, but really they are scripted for Her to say. And she can't really say much of anything while she has a dick in her mouth.
     
  13. MunkeeBiznizz

    MunkeeBiznizz Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2012
    Messages:
    5
    Likes Received:
    0
    thanks for that info. i did what you said and tried it out. it fixed it to exactly how i wanted it. i attached the new file to this reply.

    p.s. i hope i posted this right.
     

    Attached Files:

  14. Delev

    Delev Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2012
    Messages:
    86
    Likes Received:
    1
    Looks great! ;)
     
  15. booster

    booster Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2011
    Messages:
    332
    Likes Received:
    1
    you have to replace *YOU* with *ME*.
    you = man
    me = woman
     
  16. srotu

    srotu Avid Affiliate

    Joined:
    Dec 13, 2011
    Messages:
    122
    Likes Received:
    0
    ok im going to have to go try this one