Cute Imp (feedback appreciated) (1 Viewer)

[AlexNotAPerson]

Hey all! I recently made a cute demon character (at least, that was my goal) and also wrote a dialogue to go along with her. I went a little bit nuts with the dialogue, and actually think I might make it a series (in case you haven't guessed, I have no life, lol).
Anyway, the concept is pretty simple: you're off minding your own business when you're suddenly ambushed by a naked demon. She promises you that she just wants to fuck and isn't planning anything sinister, but as the dialogue progresses, it becomes evident that this encounter isn't as shallow as the demon says.
This dialogue requires Dialogue Actions to work, and the characters do use one another's names (or one character says both names, either way both names are said at one point or another). This is the first dialogue I made that needs the Dialogue Actions mod, and it's also the first time I've played around with variables, so feedback would be helpful. I would also very much appreciate if somebody could tell me a better way to end the dialogue (mechanically speaking) than just hiding his penis and clearing the dialogue.
I'll quit rambling now and just let you download the dialogue if you're interested.

 

[derpwoolf79]

I like it. Solid pacing, cute dialogue. It was some good shit. Here’s hoping we get to see more from you my dude

 

[AlexNotAPerson]

I like it. Solid pacing, cute dialogue. It was some good shit. Here’s hoping we get to see more from you my dude

Thanks!

 

[AlexNotAPerson]

***UPDATE***

I've added a few lines to the dialogue so that it isn't as repetitive and shows the characters a bit more. I also plan to start work on the next dialogue in the series some time soon if anyone's actually invested in the story (I won't be offended if you aren't, I just like the over-arching idea that I have for this being a series). Without saying too much, it's going to be a flashback, so we won't be seeing Aschii in it. But that doesn't mean you won't be getting any hot demon action.

Anyway, I'll post the updated dialogue tomorrow, and, depending on how life goes, I'll have the next installment out relatively soon.

 

[Antimatter42]

Just read your dialogue and now you've piqued my interest. I look forward to how this'll play out as a series.

 

[AlexNotAPerson]

Just read your dialogue and now you've piqued my interest. I look forward to how this'll play out as a series.

Thanks! I've had a bit of a lull with it recently (college really eats up time), but I hope to have the first draft of the second part done by Christmas.