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[RPG Maker MV] Bimspread

Discussion in 'Game Development' started by Exeryon, Oct 1, 2016.

  1. Exeryon

    Exeryon Potential Patron

    Oct 1, 2016
    Likes Received:
    Yo guys,
    I'm here to show you my first game that use the art made by Juju (tumblr Juju's Palace ; HF Hentai Foundry) and here some info about the game

    The Main Character is the only son of a single mother ex-yankee that boss him like there is no tomorrow... with some hope in his heart he found a job for gain enough money and then leave that tyrant to herself but the only job he was able to found is under a woman that hate all the male gender...
    One day while working a client, a strange old man give him a way for change his hellish life and change it in better...

    The game provide the following tags:
    - <Incest>
    - <Mind manipulation>
    - <Mind control> (partial and you'll understand why if you play this demo)
    - <Body modification>

    All the characters have an age from 18 upwards and the demo can take from 20 minutes to more depending on the player

    The demo provide a total of 3 sexual events divide 1 in the first day and 2 in the second day

    and here the link of the demo: https://mega.nz/#!LMgWULoI!mIM_qixK0...TNaaevN__RwL-E

    if you are interested into this game, search me on pateron I'm HarDra Entertainment Production

    Please report any bug and link that don't work
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2016
  2. stuntcock

    stuntcock Club Regular Staff Member Moderator

    Jun 5, 2012
    Likes Received:
    Hi @Exeryon. Welcome to the Undertow forum. Since @fleet is offline at the moment, I'll post the standard message for game creators.

    Please be aware of the Website Rules:
    People have handled this rule in several ways:
    • modify your Patreon campaign page, so that it includes hyperlinks to the various forums where people are discussing your game
    • modify your Undertow post, so that it links to your development blog instead of linking directly to your Patreon page
    • ignore the rule. A moderator will eventually delete your Patreon hyperlinks, but the thread will remain and people will still be able to discover your game (and provide feedback)
    Note: I don't intend to actually derail your thread with rules minutiae, so I'll happily remove this stuff if/when you've made the necessary changes.


    Actual feedback:
    • The Undertow userbase is international, and isn't specifically focused on Japanese hentai games. It may be useful to rewrite your game's summary so that it doesn't rely on jargon terms (such as "MC" or "yankee").
      • Imagine that someone might use an auto-translator tool. That tool would probably interpret "yankee" as "United States citizen". The resulting translation would be somewhat confusing.
    • The pathfinding/hint system worked well.
      • If the game grows in complexity (with multiple simultaneous quests) then a Journal might be useful. At the moment, it seems simple enough (and short enough) that such a feature would be superfluous.
    • Using actual in-game currency to reflect actions in the game (e.g. giving the player character $100 instead of an arbitrary quest item, such as "paycheck") is a good idea.
      • Doing so helps to keep the mandatory scripted events (e.g. daily work) solidly within the context of the player's goals (ie. raising money in order to do lewd things with women).
    • You're free to decide how to use the Tag system.
      • For example, you might add the <spanking> tag to your thread so that spanking enthusiasts can find your game more easily.
      • ... or you might prefer to tag only the high-level themes (such as <hypnotism>), and then let people discover the particulars by playing through your game.
    • I'd suggest that you inform people upfront about how much gameplay (and/or how many sex scenes) are included in the demo.
      • People may be more willing to play if they know how much time would be needed to fully play through the game (e.g. a five-minute proof of concept, or a twenty minute demo, or a 2-hour first episode, etc).
      • Also: a player might get very annoyed if an NPC hints at a quest or scene, and then the player spends time trying to access is ... only to discover that the content doesn't actually exist yet.
    • If you'd like to setup a Download page for your game then you're welcome to do so.
      • Here's an example of a previous indie H-game which was shared via Undertow.
      • There's actually a category for RPGMaker games, although you'd be the first person to actually submit one.
      • If you'd prefer to keep things simple, then it's completely OK to share your game via this forum thread.
    • The portrait for the boss lady didn't appear during conversation. I'm not sure whether this was a bug, or simply because that portrait hasn't been drawn yet.
    • You may want to clarify the age of the protagonist in your description.
      • If you hint at mother/son incest, then some people might expect shota content (and then be disappointed if the game doesn't contain any).
      • Others might avoid your game entirely because they want to avoid any sexual depictions of underaged characters.
    • If RPGMaker allows it, then it might be useful to enable Auto-Run by default.
    • The text speed/skip was good. It was possible to read through at a comfortable pace.
      • The only frustrating bits were a few scripted sections wherein the action was paused while an NPC slowly walked across the room. And those sections were only a few seconds long, so they weren't too annoying.
      • The initial delivery missions might be seen as tedious busywork, but they're probably justified. They force the player to learn the map, and also help to characterize the protagonist.
    • Some of the writing was slightly awkward. It would benefit from another editing pass.
      • Example: the narrative voice sometimes refers to the protagonist in the first person, and sometimes in the third person.
      • The big concern for me is erotic content. If I'm aware of weird writing during a sex scene, then I probably won't enjoy that scene very much.
      • I didn't have any trouble understanding the writing, and the actual gameplay goals were always clear. It's definitely possible for someone to play the game in its current state.
    • I think that the "x" key usually backs out of menus. I tried to use it to escape from the "Select a Grade" menu, but ended up in a fight instead.