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Dialogues by Jet Williams (updated 12/19/13 at 11:51)

Discussion in 'Dialogue' started by Jet Williams, Nov 21, 2013.

  1. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Check regularly for something new or if a file you already downloaded has been updated

    "Keep it in the family, A story of incest." Part 1 "Mother and son" Available now: last updated 12/11/13 at 11:53.

    "Keep it in the family, A story of incest." part 2 "sister and brother" Available now: last updated on 12/11/13 at 11:53.

    "Keep it in the family, A story of incest." part 0. "disappointed spouse" Available now: last updated on 12/19/13 at 12:31.

    Coming next: "Keep it in the family, A story of incest." part 3.

    After that: "Keep it in the family, A story of incest." part 4 (the final part)

    After I'm done with "Keep it in the family, A story of incest" I still have more I want to do including the following: Dialogues of people from RWBY. I'm a fan of RWBY and although I have seen people post that people are doing RWBY dialogues I want to do my own and I'll be making two for some of the characters because I want to do a "with stranger" as well as with a specific character from the show.
    An android girl dialogue just because I feel like it.
    Girl gets molested buy a priest.
    Accepted request from kysadhuras79: "a egypt one with pharaoh and queen or slave/bathgirl"
    And hopefully more.

    If you find anything wrong with my work like spelling/grammar or suggestions on how to make it better pm or email me subject labeled "Fixes". Also send any request you have for new work to my pm or email as well and I wont ignore it as long as the subject reads "Request". Not ignoring request does not mean I'll go all request but I will tell you whether or not I'll fill your request. I have a Facebook account for sdt stuff as well (its the globe under my pic). I also have a page in this site to take requests. http://www.sdtmods.com/index.php?topic=4838.0
     

    Attached Files:

  2. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    Sorry for the lack of updates I've been busy.
     
  3. LN1990

    LN1990 Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    If you are struggling for lines then try to imagin yourself in that situation and what would be said. Give the girl a personality.

    For example, since the mom is dissatisfied how about something like "Your dad is nothing like this, "include something that he does selfishly" or express her excitement in doing this, maybe add fear of being caught, or hint at the lust to go further, include spoilers to the next episode, have the mum hint at the sisters want to do this.

    Hope that helped. If you need more help drop me a PM or you could ask the other writers for help as well.
     
  4. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    The problem is time I started the typing the day I opened this and can only devote so much time
     
  5. azb8496

    azb8496 Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    How many lines are we talking here? I've done hundreds in a day. Albeit, not about incest, but like LN said, just put yourself in that situation and think of all the sick things you'd say or would like to hear, you sick incestual fuck. Go for the gold baby! It ain't have to be perfect, just believable.
     
  6. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    This post has been moved. I tried to post the word b-u-m-p but it came up as "I suck cocks".
     
  7. f93

    f93 Casual Client

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    Just a quick heads-up that you may want to edit your dialogue into the first post of your thread - it's a dialogue forum rule, after all.
     
  8. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    k thanks.
     
  9. f93

    f93 Casual Client

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    Okay, now that I've had a quick look over it, I've got some advice for you:

    1) A couple of your lines don't have " to end them. This means they won't actually play in-game. You have to end the line with that before you use a {, too.
    So, spelling errors aside:
    Code:
    intro:"Soooo much bigger then you father. Where did it come from?
    general:"(My daughter has bin acting weird around my son lately I wonder...){"style":"Thought"}
    
    should be:
    Code:
    intro:"Soooo much bigger then you father. Where did it come from?"
    general:"(My daughter has bin acting weird around my son lately I wonder...)"{"style":"Thought"}
    2) Except these aren't the only lines with odd spelling errors. You've got "bin" instead of "been" a lot, "then" instead of "than", etc. If you have trouble spotting them yourselves, you could always ask someone else to proofread your dialogues first.
    Incidentally, one of the lines has cum_in_throut instead of cum_in_throat, so it'll never play.

    3) Somewhat odd little line variety. You only have a single resistance line (which will play a lot) and four each of first_dt and first_throat lines (each of which can only be triggered once). Try to have more lines for the ones that play more often (intro/resistance for before first_dt, and even more general/pull_off lines for after).

    4) Bits of it don't really feel like a mother-son incest dialogue. Incest dialogues are not exactly something I'm into anyway, but I can't see many older ladies saying "Awww nasty. Why did you do that." or "It hit the back. You can fill me completely with your thing". Both of these sound more like something a younger girl would say to, for instance, her father or older brother, than a mother saying to her son.
    Unless it's a totally radical skateboarding mother or something. I just didn't get that vibe from the rest of it.

    5) You might want to use more actions, like maybe
    Code:
    cum_on_face:"[SHOCK]Oh god, it's so hot!"
    or some use of [ARMS_HAND_JOB] to make the handjob lines actually reachable without opening the menu. Maybe she offers him a handjob randomly in a restart (although be sure to have some way that puts her hands elsewhere eventually so that it's possible to stop said handjob).

    6) You might want to look into Pim_gd's Dialogue Checker, which picks up on things like lines SDT isn't able to play. It's not perfect (and you'll want to manually check spelling anyway), but it's a lot better than trawling through the entire file to try and find where you missed a ".
     
  10. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    I put more than one resistance line but for some reason they just vanished or something. oh well I fixed the spelling, added resistance lines, and added lines to go in and out of hand job mode with out going in the menu so it should be better.
     
  11. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    held:"Staying down like that really gets you going doesn't it?"{"held":"false"}

    Adding this one to the checker.
    Such a line is impossible.

    Also...
    Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([Shock]) on line 10 refers to a non-existing line.
    Line 10: cum_on_face:"[Shock]Oh god, it's so hot!"

    turn it into [SHOCK]
     
  12. f93

    f93 Casual Client

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    Not quite. The held linetype refers to being "held" using the spacebar, whereas {"held":"false"} lines trigger only when his hands are set to loose.

    Code:
    all:"CLEAR"
    held:"Staying down like that really gets you going doesn't it?[RELEASE]"{"held":"false"}
    held:"Blah blah blah.[HOLD]"{"held":"true"}
    
     
  13. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    I fixed the SHOCK problem and was aware of the held = spacebar for talk but the check is for the hand position or the line would not have existed. Now if you don't mind I have part 2 to finish.
     
  14. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    I had no such idea.
    Huh.

    Jet, do you want me to look over the spelling for this?
     
  15. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Jet Williams, Dialogues.

    like I put at the top feel free to send me corrections on spelling and grammar.
     
  16. f93

    f93 Casual Client

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    Re: Dialogues by Jet Williams (updated 12/5/13 at 11:21)

    The only other person doing those is me, and I'm doing them very slowly. I only ever got around to finishing Ruby herself. All of the girls have been requested at different points, so I guess the demand is certainly there.

    Edit: I'll at least spellcheck your incest dialogues, even though this really isn't my thing (so I can't add many lines that seem natural).
     
  17. Jet Williams

    Jet Williams Potential Patron

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    Re: Dialogues by Jet Williams (updated 12/5/13 at 11:21)

    I've seen the number of requests made and that's another reason I wanted to do them. I also have hair mods for all the people I want to do dialogues for as well as your text file for ruby because I'm a huge fan of the show (and of porn).