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Grade Whore // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid // Camp BJ

Discussion in 'Dialogue' started by karlpaws, Aug 12, 2013.

  1. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2013
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    Dialog Name: Grade Whore

    Dialog Description: A college student did not do so well on her last test (she blames the TA) and goes to see the professor about it. She hopes she can negotiate an alternate test for a better grade.

    Dialog style: The dialog is broken into 5 chunks. There is an intro dialog between the two of them. If broken the script should skip to the first 'chapter'. Each of the 3 chapters ends with an exchange between the two. The 5th part is "extra credit". Get him to cum a couple times, or just hit "J" a few times, and it'll play the last few lines.

    Almost all triggers (resistance, throating, hand job strokes, pull offs, etc) will call a line of text based on a counter that is increased by each line. This is a rather rigid system, I know, but seemed to fit best with the porn movie plot kinda script I had in mind and a challenge over the basic random one liner generator that I have found so far. It does have the limitation that you can run right over the lines if you are aggressive and hard on the "her" actor, and might break the system. It should be setup that if you do miss a line (mostly by hitting a cum trigger at the same time), the next trigger should fire it.

    The script uses the concept that the female student is extremely eager and the male professor is initally reluctant and uncertain, eventually getting into the flow of things. This can be changed by editing the lines each say while leaving the basic structure intact. The structure could also be used for boss/employee negotiations (raises, hiring, etc), or similar.

    I have included the character type I used in the file. Feel free to change the hair to your own preferred type of course, and of the colors to your own favorite school colors... or change up the whole outfit for a more slutty, clubbing style for more blatant seduction.

    Rev 1.1 added after first pass from Pim's Checker.http://www.swfcabin.com/open/1375729079



    Succubus Has Lunch

    Here is another dialog, hopefully filling a request by Xiobe.
    http://www.sdtmods.com/index.php?topic=4174.0

    Pick your favorite dungeon/jail/prison/cave background and demony or odd-colored-skin girl. I have one option in the dialog.

    I suggest you start with his hands free+hidden, her mood normal or angry. It will increase through the dialog and give you an ending at ahegao mood.

    Reworked some of the scripting, added some lines, took out a couple others. Uploading this as a separate one, just in case anyone wants to compare both. This one should have less repeats on the cum lines, and not run through double or 3 times as he shoots.


    A Rescue Repaid
    Filling the [Bodyguard] request by Xiobe http://www.sdtmods.com/index.php?topic=4174.msg60436#msg60436

    I left this one generic enough, both by request (and because it works) that pretty much any HIM / Her pairing, background or costume mod fits the dialog.

    It is a little chatty, since most of the triggers call a line from him and then one from her. If anyone has any suggestions on how to deal with that, or if you like it, please let me know. (Having to make an account to give feedback is probably one reason why not as much is posted compared to the download numbers. It is easy and free though, so make one!)

    And can someone direct me to a place where we can post snippets of code to discuss the mechanics? There is mention of a library in other posts but no links that I saw.



    Camp Counselor Blowjob

    Here is another dialog I came up with after making a couple backgrounds. I used The Hermit's watching girls and a couple of Xiombarg's "Pleasant Scenery" images. One looked a bit like a cabin at a summer camp, and this is what resulted while I was clipping and cleaning the images.

    Story... such as it is: Several girls are at a summer camp where sex is the order of the day. A camper and counselor get the morning started off with some early oral, and another camper comes by with a new camper. Being new to the camp and to sex, she gets an intro course in both.

    Here is the code for an outfit that matches what the watching girls are wearing:
    Code:
    charName:Yumi;mood:Normal;bodyScale:1.01375;arms:onlegs,onlegs;throatResist:13;hair:misato,1,0,1;iris:wide,115,127,162,1;breasts:84;skin:tan;nose:normal;ear:normal;lipstick:0,255,167,188,1;eyeshadow:0,0,84,1;sclera:0,0,0,0;blush:0,0,0,0;freckles:60,24,24,0.8,0;mascara:0,0,0,1,100;nailpolish:51,0,6,1;eyebrow:normal,50,34,33,1,0,0,0,1;hairhsl:-139,3.21,0.8,0.98;skinhsl:0,1,1,1;hisskinhsl:0,1,1,1;bg:3;hisBody:male;hisPenis:1,1.1,1.1;balls:1,1;hisSkin:0;hisTop:shirt,238,242,245,1;hisBottoms:slacks,27,29,29,1;hisFootwear:loafers,0,0,0,1;collar:none,84,0,6,1,232,240,255,1;cuffs:none,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1;gag:none,0,0,0,1;panties:none,63,118,162,1;top:none,63,118,162,1;armwear:none,0,0,0,1;bottoms:skirt,167,150,150,1,0,0,0,1;tops:shirt,255,255,255,0.706;legwear:kneehigh,63,118,162,0.71,0,0,0,1;footwear:school,102,64,64,1,41,21,23,1;eyewear:none,0,0,0,1;headwear:none,24,24,24,1,255,255,255,1;tonguePiercing:none,183,187,195,1;nipplePiercing:ring,84,0,6,1;bellyPiercing:ring,176,176,174,1;earring:ring,0,42,105,1;herTan:full,0.19
    Send me a PM if you want the transparent images of the watching girls for your own BGs or send me links of the pics you'd like merged and I'll see what I can do.



    Pair of Damsels

    Call this v2 of the Rescue Repaid dialog above. It will include some of the lines from that and more to setup a scene with two females that "YOU" have rescued... from something. Maybe just boredom at a club. It will need a name set for YOU and ME, and has a third name built into the dialog which you can change to whatever you want (similar to the Camp BJ setup).

    A background is below. I can put the extra girl in that on any other BG you wish to PM or link me.

    No position changes in this one but you can pull her up and down to toggle release/hold or handjob/mouth. Try "holding" her down when his hands are free. See the animtools thread in the Loader Imports forum for animtools version of this dialog.
     

    Attached Files:

  2. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2013
    Messages:
    720
    Likes Received:
    50
    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Hello new forum member - that's you, Karlpaws!
    I'd like to introduce you to my DialogueChecker (link in signature)!

    I found 105 issue(s) with your dialogue, of which 0 were severe.
    Space at start of new line on line 38, col 70 near "(...) Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Usage of colon in dialogue line or erroneous space before dialogue line on line 38, col 203 near "(...) Present: *ME* (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Usage of %01 on line 38.
    Don't use the old way of delaying dialogue (with %01). It clutters your dialogue. During testing, I found that 1x Б equals 1x %01. Suggested fix: Replace %01 with Б.
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Found a probable illegal colon on line 38, col 203. Replace colons in dialogue lines with %3A.
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 38, col 213 near "(...) and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 38, col 204 near "(...) Present: *ME* and (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    The following error was found on line 40 after removing (*ME*) subsitutes, triggers and delay characters:
    Space before period for new line on line 40, col 24 near "(...) Miss . How (...)"
    Line 40: intro_A:"HIM> Hello Miss . How can I help you today?"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_B"}

    Space at start of new line on line 41, col 141 near "(...) test!ББББББББББББББББББББ%0A I (...)"
    Line 41: intro_B:"her> [ANGRY_MOOD]This is BS. Professor *YOU*. [NORMAL_MOOD]ББББББББББББББББББББ Your TA shafted me on that test!ББББББББББББББББББББ%0A I got *foreplay* Multiple choice right, ББББББББББББББББББББ%0A*shortanswers* Short answer questions,ББББББББББББББББББББ%0A and *essay* on my essay.ББББББББББББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_C"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 42 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 42, col 29 near "(...) um.. not (...)"
    Line 42: intro_C:"HIM> Oh? I'm .. um.. not sure what I can do about that. "{"style":"Him","next":"intro_D"}

    Invalid trigger ([LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG]) on line 43, col 62
    Line 43: intro_D:"her> [HAPPY_MOOD] ... well Professor *YOU*, there is [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG][AHEGAO_MOOD] something I have in mind... ББББББББББББББББББББa way to retake that test.ББББББББББББББББББББ[HAPPY_MOOD]LEFT_ARM_LEGS"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_E"}

    There will be a space before a comma if the player name is not set, on line 43, col 45 near "(...) Professor *YOU*, (...)"
    Line 43: intro_D:"her> [HAPPY_MOOD] ... well Professor *YOU*, there is [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG][AHEGAO_MOOD] something I have in mind... ББББББББББББББББББББa way to retake that test.ББББББББББББББББББББ[HAPPY_MOOD]LEFT_ARM_LEGS"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_E"}

    Double space on line 44, col 49 near "(...) idea? ББББББББББББББББББББ[intro_F]"{"style":"H(...)"
    Line 44: intro_E:"HIM> Oh.. ok .. um .. what is your idea? ББББББББББББББББББББ[intro_F]"{"style":"Him"}

    Unknown line-attribute "Style" on line 47.
    Line 47: intro_one:"[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"Style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 58 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 58, col 58 near "(...) right? So, (...)"
    Line 58: lickpC:"her> The first section was multiple choice, right? So, A is gonna be licking [lickpD]"{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 62 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 62, col 74 near "(...) cheating. We (...)"
    Line 62: lickpG:"HIM> I hope no one catches us. %0Aher> But ... we're not cheating. We make the rules for this test.%0AHIM>Th th the t tes test ha had 20.. 20 questions. %0Aher> Goody! I wanna get started.[ARMS_HAND_JOB] "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 69, col 22 near "chap_one_grading:"HIM> Oh (...)"
    Line 69: chap_one_grading:"HIM> Oh *ME*. That was amazing. I guess I can give you ББББББББББББББББББББ *foreplay* points for the multiple choice part of the test.ББББББББББББББББББББ[chap1a]"{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 72, col 20 near "(...) um... you (...)"
    Line 72: chap2a:"So ... um... you got a *shortanswers* on the short answer section ?ББББББББББББББББББББ I can ask you few I guess.. keeping with the nature of the situation.ББББББББББББББББББББ[chap2aa]"{"style":"Him"}

    Grammatical error (space before question mark) on line 72, col 74 near "(...) section ?ББББББББББББББББББББ (...)"
    Line 72: chap2a:"So ... um... you got a *shortanswers* on the short answer section ?ББББББББББББББББББББ I can ask you few I guess.. keeping with the nature of the situation.ББББББББББББББББББББ[chap2aa]"{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 73 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 73, col 111 near "(...) slut? Show (...)"
    Line 73: chap2aa:"Hmmm ...... Ok. Here is your first makeup question. You said you were a bad girl. Are you a good slut? Show me how good a slut you are."{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 76, col 22 near "chap_two_grading:"HIM> Let (...)"
    Line 76: chap_two_grading:"HIM> Let me mark down that you earned *shortanswers* points for the short answer part. ББББББББББББББББББББ Now for your essay.[startessay]" {"style":"Him","set":{"chapter":"three"}}

    Double space on line 79, col 17 near "startessay2:"her> Well, (...)"
    Line 79: startessay2:"her> Well, since I'm on my knees ...ББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB] with my hand on your cock ...ББББББББББББББББББББ [RIGHT_ARM_HIS_LEGS] and my other hand on your balls ...ББББББББББББББББББББ[startessay3]"{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 80, col 111 near "(...) cum ... (...)"
    Line 80: startessay3:"her> I've wiped *facial* your cum off my face ...ББББББББББББББББББББ swallowed *meal* of your cum ... ББББББББББББББББББББ and had you shoot *gullet* straight down my throat ... ББББББББББББББББББББ[startessay4]"{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 84, col 58 near "(...) mouth. You've (...)"
    Line 84: chap_three_grading:"HIM> *ME*. Oh Fuck *ME*. What a mouth. You've earned .. lets say ... *essay* points for the essay porton.[testtally]" {"style":"Him","set":{"chapter":"four"}}

    Double space on line 85, col 15 near "testtally:"HIM> So (...)"
    Line 85: testtally:"HIM> So *ME*, lets see... you have Б.Б.Б.Б.Б.Б oh screw the made up points. You are such a good little slut-whore I'm giving you an A on the test.БББББББББ[chap_three_ex]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a space before a comma if the girl's name is not set, on line 85, col 19 near "(...) So *ME*, (...)"
    Line 85: testtally:"HIM> So *ME*, lets see... you have Б.Б.Б.Б.Б.Б oh screw the made up points. You are such a good little slut-whore I'm giving you an A on the test.БББББББББ[chap_three_ex]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 86, col 42 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 86: chap_three_ex:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... If I'm a really really good slut do you think I can get a little extra credit?[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][extracredit]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 88, col 46 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 88: chap_four_grading:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... think I can get a little more extra credit?[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][extracredit]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 90, col 50 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 90: chap_four_grading_end:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... but ... БББББББББ[end]"{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 93 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 93, col 30 near "(...) ME*. Wait.. (...)"
    Line 93: end2:"HIM> I'd like that* ME*. Wait.. is this your test over here?[end3]"{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 94, col 49 near "(...) ... БББББББББ[end4]"{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 94: end3:"HIM> It looks like you passed this test ... БББББББББ[end4]"{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 101, col 19 near "first_dt:".Aaaaaah. That (...)"
    Line 101: first_dt:".Aaaaaah. That must be E .. all of the above."{"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","dt":"true"}}

    Line 117 is unused!
    Line 117: pulled_off:"pulled off 1 check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"style":"Him"}

    Line 118 is unused!
    Line 118: pulled_off:"pulled off 2 check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"style":"Thought"}

    Line 119 is unused!
    Line 119: pulled_off:"pulled off speak check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"

    Line 120 is unused!
    Line 120: pulled_off:"pulled off speak check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"

    Invalid trigger ([WINK]) on line 129, col 26
    Line 129: woken:"Thank you *YOU*... [WINK] maybe I can take my next test this way? [WINK]"{"style":"Him"}

    Invalid trigger ([WINK]) on line 129, col 26
    Line 129: woken:"Thank you *YOU*... [WINK] maybe I can take my next test this way? [WINK]"{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 136 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 136, col 45 near "(...) ... lab (...)"
    Line 136: storyline_one_C:"I might need to give you ... lab work. "{"style":"Him"}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 142. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 142: storyline_one_3:"This is probably not what everyone meant by 'hard teacher'" {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 143. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 143: storyline_one_4:"You really shouldn't be doing this.ББББББББББ[storyline_*chapter*_A]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 144. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 144: storyline_one_5:"Gotta pass this test... and its such a nice test.[LOOK_UP]" {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 152 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 152, col 72 near "(...) that *ME* [SWITCHJACKFONDLE]" (...)"
    Line 152: storyline_one_9:"You're ..um gonna have to .. um .. try harder than that *ME* [SWITCHJACKFONDLE]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 154, col 16 near "SWITCHJACKFONDLE:" Time (...)"
    Line 154: SWITCHJACKFONDLE:" Time for a little 'Answer B'.[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB][RIGHT_ARM_HIS_LEGS]ББББББББББ" {"style":"Thought"}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 162. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 162: storyline_one_14:"You really shouldn't be doing this.ББББББББББ[storyline_*chapter*_A]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 164, col 26 near "(...) me *YOU* I (...)"
    Line 164: storyline_one_15:"Teach me *YOU* I need to get my grades up. ББББББББББ " {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 165 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 165, col 33 near "(...) *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" (...)"
    Line 165: storyline_one_15:"Teach me *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" {"style":"Thought"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 166 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 166, col 33 near "(...) *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" (...)"
    Line 166: storyline_one_15:"Teach me *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" {"style":"Thought"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 167 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 167, col 33 near "(...) *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" (...)"
    Line 167: storyline_one_15:"Teach me *YOU*. [storyline_*chapter*_D]" {"style":"Thought"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 169 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 169, col 47 near "(...) hot. [switchblowjob]"{"style":"Him","set":{"fo(...)"
    Line 169: storyline_one_16:"Your naughty mouth is so hot. [switchblowjob]"{"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 171 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 171, col 50 near "(...) D? [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEGS]" (...)"
    Line 171: switchblowjob:"So you want a little more answer D? [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEGS]" {"style":"Thought"}

    Double space on line 177, col 57 near "(...) cheating. ББББББББББ (...)"
    Line 177: storyline_one_18:"*foreplay* questions done. No cheating. ББББББББББ [storyline_*chapter*_A] "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 179, col 68 near "(...) D. Shouldn't (...)"
    Line 179: storyline_one_19:"*foreplay* questions done. We have A, B, C, and D. Shouldn't there be an E? ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"},"check":{"dt":"false"}}

    Double space on line 187, col 25 near "storyline_one_21:"Oookay. Bonus (...)"
    Line 187: storyline_one_21:"Oookay. Bonus number 1." {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    Double space on line 188, col 25 near "storyline_one_22:"Aaaand. Bonus (...)"
    Line 188: storyline_one_22:"Aaaand. Bonus number 2." {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    Double space on line 196, col 55 near "(...) you. You (...)"
    Line 196: storyline_two_25:"HIM> *ME* is a good slut, aren't you. You suck on that cock so good. ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 196, col 22 near "storyline_two_25:"HIM> *ME* is (...)"
    Line 196: storyline_two_25:"HIM> *ME* is a good slut, aren't you. You suck on that cock so good. ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    An uneven amount of double quotes was found on line 202. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 202: storyline_two_32:"HIM> You didn't study for your test so you came to suck my cock, didn't you slut?{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 205 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 205, col 51 near "(...) ....<<shhluuurp>> every (...)"
    Line 205: storyline_two_35:"her> Every test ....<<shhluuurp>> every question <<shhluuurp>> "{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    Double space on line 209, col 51 near "(...) whore. You (...)"
    Line 209: storyline_two_39:"HIM> You are a good little whore. You feel wonderful sucking on my dick.ББББББББББ"{"set":{"shortanswers":"+1","count":"+1"},"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 220, col 101 near "(...) whore. ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","next":"chap2b"(...)"
    Line 220: storyline_two_48:"HIM> Aaaahhh. I thББ think we can woББ work somethiiing out, my slutty grade whore. ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","next":"chap2b","set":{"count":"+3","shortanswers":"+3"}}

    Invalid trigger ([RIGHT_ARM_LEG]) on line 228, col 21
    Line 228: essay_general_lines:"[RIGHT_ARM_LEG]Those are good points ... %0Aher> and this [RIGHT_ARM_HIS_LEGS] is a great point."{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Double space on line 228, col 61 near "(...) ... %0Aher> (...)"
    Line 228: essay_general_lines:"[RIGHT_ARM_LEG]Those are good points ... %0Aher> and this [RIGHT_ARM_HIS_LEGS] is a great point."{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Invalid trigger ([LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG]) on line 230, col 26
    Line 230: essay_general_lines:"her> [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG] Grade whores use everything.. do anything."{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Invalid trigger ([RIGHT_ARM_LEG]) on line 234, col 84
    Line 234: essay_general_lines:" So that saying 'Nice girls spit, Naughty girls swallow' ... [RIGHT_ARM_LEG]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Double space on line 234, col 81 near "(...) ... (...)"
    Line 234: essay_general_lines:" So that saying 'Nice girls spit, Naughty girls swallow' ... [RIGHT_ARM_LEG]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 234, col 19 near "essay_general_lines:" So (...)"
    Line 234: essay_general_lines:" So that saying 'Nice girls spit, Naughty girls swallow' ... [RIGHT_ARM_LEG]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    There will be a space before a comma if the girl's name is not set, on line 236, col 43 near "(...) throat *ME*, (...)"
    Line 236: essay_general_lines:"Keep using your throat *ME*, you little slut. "{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 239 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 239, col 37 near "(...) ... oh (...)"
    Line 239: essay_general_lines:"Suck my cock ... oh yeah suck on my cock."{"style":"Him"}

    The following error was found on line 242 after removing (*ME*) subsitutes, triggers and delay characters:
    Space before period for new line on line 242, col 33 near "(...) working . Suck (...)"
    Line 242: essay_general_lines:"Keep working . Suck this Professor cock."{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 244, col 51 near "(...) Professor *YOU* was (...)"
    Line 244: essay_general_lines:"Everyone always said Professor *YOU* was a hard teacher, but I didnt think they meant it this way."{"style":"Thought"}

    Double space on line 257, col 29 near "storyline_three_100:"Ahhhhhhh thБББ (...)"
    Line 257: storyline_three_100:"Ahhhhhhh thБББ that'sБББenББ enough* ME*.ББББББББББББББББ[chap_three_grading]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Double space on line 259, col 73 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 259: storyline_four_105:" There's Lots more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 259, col 18 near "storyline_four_105:" There's (...)"
    Line 259: storyline_four_105:" There's Lots more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 260, col 73 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 260: storyline_four_106:" There's Lots more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 260, col 18 near "storyline_four_106:" There's (...)"
    Line 260: storyline_four_106:" There's Lots more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 261, col 77 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 261: storyline_four_107:" There's ..some.. more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 261, col 18 near "storyline_four_107:" There's (...)"
    Line 261: storyline_four_107:" There's ..some.. more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 262, col 77 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 262: storyline_four_108:" There's ..some.. more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 262, col 18 near "storyline_four_108:" There's (...)"
    Line 262: storyline_four_108:" There's ..some.. more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 263, col 85 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 263: storyline_four_109:" There's a .. um .. a bit more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 263, col 18 near "storyline_four_109:" There's (...)"
    Line 263: storyline_four_109:" There's a .. um .. a bit more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Double space on line 264, col 85 near "(...) from. "{"style":"Him"}"
    Line 264: storyline_four_110:" There's a .. um .. a bit more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 264, col 18 near "storyline_four_110:" There's (...)"
    Line 264: storyline_four_110:" There's a .. um .. a bit more extra credit where that came from. "{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 265, col 18 near "storyline_four_111:" Awwww.... (...)"
    Line 265: storyline_four_111:" Awwww.... no more extra credit? [end]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 266, col 18 near "storyline_four_112:" Awwww.... (...)"
    Line 266: storyline_four_112:" Awwww.... no more extra credit? [end]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 267, col 18 near "storyline_four_113:" Awwww.... (...)"
    Line 267: storyline_four_113:" Awwww.... no more extra credit? [end]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 268, col 18 near "storyline_four_114:" Awwww.... (...)"
    Line 268: storyline_four_114:" Awwww.... no more extra credit? [end]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 269, col 18 near "storyline_four_115:" Awwww.... (...)"
    Line 269: storyline_four_115:" Awwww.... no more extra credit? [end]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 271, col 18 near "storyline_four_116:" Ok... (...)"
    Line 271: storyline_four_116:" Ok... see you ... and your cock ... tomorrow."{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 272, col 18 near "storyline_four_117:" Ok... (...)"
    Line 272: storyline_four_117:" Ok... see you ... and your cock ... tomorrow."{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 273, col 18 near "storyline_four_118:" Ok... (...)"
    Line 273: storyline_four_118:" Ok... see you ... and your cock ... tomorrow."{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 274, col 18 near "storyline_four_119:" Ok... (...)"
    Line 274: storyline_four_119:" Ok... see you ... and your cock ... tomorrow."{"style":"Him"}

    Space at start of new line on line 275, col 18 near "storyline_four_120:" Ok... (...)"
    Line 275: storyline_four_120:" Ok... see you ... and your cock ... tomorrow."{"style":"Him"}

    The following error(s) were found on line 301 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 301, col 13 near "swallowit_one:" Too (...)"
    Line 301: swallowit_one:" Too bad I can't get smarter from this."{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"more","count":"+1"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 302 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 302, col 13 near "swallowit_one:" Is (...)"
    Line 302: swallowit_one:" Is there an F? None of the Above? "{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"more"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 303 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 303, col 13 near "swallowit_two:" I (...)"
    Line 303: swallowit_two:" I like these kinds of tests. "{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"a mouthful"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 304 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 304, col 13 near "swallowit_two:" All (...)"
    Line 304: swallowit_two:" All part of a balanced diet. "{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"a mouthful"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 305 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 305, col 15 near "swallowit_three:" Deepthroat (...)"
    Line 305: swallowit_three:" Deepthroat sluts love to swallow cum."{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"a meal's worth","count":"+5"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 306 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Double space on line 306, col 65 near "(...) lots of (...)"
    Line 306: swallowit_three:" Sluts love to whore for grades... they get lots of cock and cum"{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"a meal's","count":"+5"}}

    Space at start of new line on line 306, col 15 near "swallowit_three:" Sluts (...)"
    Line 306: swallowit_three:" Sluts love to whore for grades... they get lots of cock and cum"{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"a meal's","count":"+5"}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 307 after removing triggers and delay (Б) characters:
    Space at start of new line on line 307, col 14 near "swallowit_four:" Extra (...)"
    Line 307: swallowit_four:" Extra credit is tasty."{"style":"Him","set":{"meal":"2 meal's worth"}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 316, col 29 near "(...) around *YOUR* cock) (...)"
    Line 316: CUMT_one:"(*ME* smiles around *YOUR* cock) That was quick. Guess he did not study for this test."{"style":"Him","set":{"gullet":"a bunch"}}

    Double space on line 317, col 17 near "CUMT_two:"Oooooh. You've (...)"
    Line 317: CUMT_two:"Oooooh. You've got such a silky throat."{"style":"Him","set":{"gullet":"a lot"}}

    Double space on line 319, col 18 near "CUMT_three:"Nummy! Now (...)"
    Line 319: CUMT_three:"Nummy! Now I won't need lunch."{"style":"Him","set":{"gullet":"a whole lot","count":"+5"}}

    Failed to properly parse line-attributes for line 327, parsing stopped at col 52 at ",{"check":"count":"111"}}"
    Line 327: restart_four:"[chap_four_grading_end]"{"style":"Him",{"check":"count":"111"}}

    Basically, there's a couple bugs in there. I'd be happy to help you with fishing them out for you if you need the help.
     
  3. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Thanks for the welcome Pim. I'll have to look through that list later, but a with quick look I saw mostly double spaces, double periods and such. Those were mostly intentional, especially around the pauses and such. Made for easier editing.

    If that's the kind of thing that really bothers people I can take em out. Since I was writing it they didn't bother me, but that's also why you have an editor - find the stuff you ignored cause you knew what it should say.
     
  4. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

    Joined:
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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Well, if you'll try the dialogue checker you'll see it's equipped with the functionality to disable grammar checking. That way it only checks for things like syntax errors (I saw some mistakes already with checking variables near the end), substitutes and unused lines.

    In case SWFCabin is acting up and you don't want to go through all the trouble, here's a list of things with the grammar category unchecked:
    Dialogue was checked in 87 ms.
    I found 33 issue(s) with your dialogue, of which 0 were severe.
    Usage of colon in dialogue line or erroneous space before dialogue line on line 38, col 203 near "(...) Present: *ME* (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Usage of %01 on line 38.
    Don't use the old way of delaying dialogue (with %01). It clutters your dialogue. During testing, I found that 1x Б equals 1x %01. Suggested fix: Replace %01 with Б.
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Found a probable illegal colon on line 38, col 203. Replace colons in dialogue lines with %3A.
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 38, col 213 near "(...) and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 38, col 204 near "(...) Present: *ME* and (...)"
    Line 38: intro_open:"[NORMAL_STYLE][NORMAL_MOOD][ARMS_LEGS]*ME* the Grade Whore%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 <Curtains Open>%0A %01%01%01%01%01%01 -Interior, Professor *YOU *Dickeinstein's Office - %0ACharacters Present: *ME* and *YOU* %0AББББББББББББББББББББ [LEFT_ARM_LEGS][RIGHT_ARM_LOOSE]"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_A","set":{"chapter":"one","count":1}}

    Invalid trigger ([LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG]) on line 43, col 62
    Line 43: intro_D:"her> [HAPPY_MOOD] ... well Professor *YOU*, there is [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG][AHEGAO_MOOD] something I have in mind... ББББББББББББББББББББa way to retake that test.ББББББББББББББББББББ[HAPPY_MOOD]LEFT_ARM_LEGS"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_E"}

    There will be a space before a comma if the player name is not set, on line 43, col 45 near "(...) Professor *YOU*, (...)"
    Line 43: intro_D:"her> [HAPPY_MOOD] ... well Professor *YOU*, there is [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG][AHEGAO_MOOD] something I have in mind... ББББББББББББББББББББa way to retake that test.ББББББББББББББББББББ[HAPPY_MOOD]LEFT_ARM_LEGS"{"style":"Him","next":"intro_E"}

    Unknown line-attribute "Style" on line 47.
    Line 47: intro_one:"[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"Style":"Him"}

    There will be a space before a comma if the girl's name is not set, on line 85, col 19 near "(...) So *ME*, (...)"
    Line 85: testtally:"HIM> So *ME*, lets see... you have Б.Б.Б.Б.Б.Б oh screw the made up points. You are such a good little slut-whore I'm giving you an A on the test.БББББББББ[chap_three_ex]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 86, col 42 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 86: chap_three_ex:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... If I'm a really really good slut do you think I can get a little extra credit?[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][extracredit]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 88, col 46 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 88: chap_four_grading:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... think I can get a little more extra credit?[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][extracredit]"{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 90, col 50 near "(...) Professor *YOU* ... (...)"
    Line 90: chap_four_grading_end:"her> Oh thank you Professor *YOU* ... but ... БББББББББ[end]"{"style":"Him"}

    Line 117 is unused!
    Line 117: pulled_off:"pulled off 1 check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"style":"Him"}

    Line 118 is unused!
    Line 118: pulled_off:"pulled off 2 check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"style":"Thought"}

    Line 119 is unused!
    Line 119: pulled_off:"pulled off speak check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"

    Line 120 is unused!
    Line 120: pulled_off:"pulled off speak check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"

    Invalid trigger ([WINK]) on line 129, col 26
    Line 129: woken:"Thank you *YOU*... [WINK] maybe I can take my next test this way? [WINK]"{"style":"Him"}

    Invalid trigger ([WINK]) on line 129, col 26
    Line 129: woken:"Thank you *YOU*... [WINK] maybe I can take my next test this way? [WINK]"{"style":"Him"}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 142. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 142: storyline_one_3:"This is probably not what everyone meant by 'hard teacher'" {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 143. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 143: storyline_one_4:"You really shouldn't be doing this.ББББББББББ[storyline_*chapter*_A]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 144. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 144: storyline_one_5:"Gotta pass this test... and its such a nice test.[LOOK_UP]" {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    The following error(s) were found on line 152 after removing delay (Б) characters:
    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 152, col 72 near "(...) that *ME* [SWITCHJACKFONDLE]" (...)"
    Line 152: storyline_one_9:"You're ..um gonna have to .. um .. try harder than that *ME* [SWITCHJACKFONDLE]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 162. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 162: storyline_one_14:"You really shouldn't be doing this.ББББББББББ[storyline_*chapter*_A]" {"style":"Him","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 164, col 26 near "(...) me *YOU* I (...)"
    Line 164: storyline_one_15:"Teach me *YOU* I need to get my grades up. ББББББББББ " {"style":"Thought","set":{"foreplay":"+1","count":"+1"}}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the girl's name is not set, on line 196, col 22 near "storyline_two_25:"HIM> *ME* is (...)"
    Line 196: storyline_two_25:"HIM> *ME* is a good slut, aren't you. You suck on that cock so good. ББББББББББ"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    An uneven amount of double quotes was found on line 202. This could indicate a coding error.
    Line 202: storyline_two_32:"HIM> You didn't study for your test so you came to suck my cock, didn't you slut?{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+1","shortanswers":"+1"}}

    Invalid trigger ([RIGHT_ARM_LEG]) on line 228, col 21
    Line 228: essay_general_lines:"[RIGHT_ARM_LEG]Those are good points ... %0Aher> and this [RIGHT_ARM_HIS_LEGS] is a great point."{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Invalid trigger ([LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG]) on line 230, col 26
    Line 230: essay_general_lines:"her> [LEFT_ARM_HIS_LEG] Grade whores use everything.. do anything."{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    Invalid trigger ([RIGHT_ARM_LEG]) on line 234, col 84
    Line 234: essay_general_lines:" So that saying 'Nice girls spit, Naughty girls swallow' ... [RIGHT_ARM_LEG]"{"style":"Him","set":{"count":"+5"}}

    There will be a space before a comma if the girl's name is not set, on line 236, col 43 near "(...) throat *ME*, (...)"
    Line 236: essay_general_lines:"Keep using your throat *ME*, you little slut. "{"style":"Him"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 244, col 51 near "(...) Professor *YOU* was (...)"
    Line 244: essay_general_lines:"Everyone always said Professor *YOU* was a hard teacher, but I didnt think they meant it this way."{"style":"Thought"}

    There will be a double space in the dialogue line if the player name is not set, on line 316, col 29 near "(...) around *YOUR* cock) (...)"
    Line 316: CUMT_one:"(*ME* smiles around *YOUR* cock) That was quick. Guess he did not study for this test."{"style":"Him","set":{"gullet":"a bunch"}}

    Failed to properly parse line-attributes for line 327, parsing stopped at col 52 at ",{"check":"count":"111"}}"
    Line 327: restart_four:"[chap_four_grading_end]"{"style":"Him",{"check":"count":"111"}}

    Once you've fixed these issues, try letting me look your dialogue over again. Maybe I'll find something new.
     
  5. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    New version is up. I think I missed a few corrections on my last edit :-[

    I wanted to ask separately about a couple things, hence this reply.

    The pulled_off trigger I think I do not fully understand. Are there special rules on how to get that called? I think it is supposed to run when you pull "her" head off of "him" before a deep throat, but does it only trigger when "her" head is held? I don't have any grab/hold or release triggers since the concept revolves around her being more willing than he, and him in control doesn't make sense.

    Line 117 is unused!
    Line 117: pulled_off:"pulled off 1 check[storyline_*chapter*_*count*]"{"style":"Him"}

    How much of an issue is it using colons inside quoted/dialog text? They printed out fine on my playthroughs so I never noticed an issue that your checker flagged.

    Found a probable illegal colon on line 38, col 203. Replace colons in dialogue lines with %3A.

    I really don't care about double spaces if names never get entered by the user. Normally I would have an If/Then block and check myself, inserting in stock names. Is there is a way to do that with the Initial_values string?
     
  6. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

    Joined:
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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Colons can trip up the variable system and there was something while back that somebody reported dialogues didn't work due to colons. I intend to eventually add a style category where things like this get moved to - things that aren't WRONG but could be improved.

    pulled_off isn't registering as used because the linename has to be "pull_off" for it to work. And they're going to get called a lot, so take them out in a final version. I think they trigger about every time she takes it out of her mouth.
    Dialogue guide has this: "pull_off - Triggers often, typically when sliding off the cock or pulling her off."

    There's one serious issue left:
    Unable to identify line-attribute value for attribute (check) on line 327.
    Line 327: restart_four:"[chap_four_grading_end]"{"style":"Him","check"{"count":"111"}}

    Basically, there is no value set for the check line-attribute, and that's because you are missing a colon.

    Fixing the name thing by placing stock names is uh... a lot of work.
    Here's how that would work:
    Code:
    initial_settings:{"nameSet":"true","namechecked":"false","stockHer":"Alice","stockHim":"Bob"}
    
    intro:"[namecheck*namechecked*]"
    namecheckfalse:"[nameset*ME*]" {"set":{"namechecked":"true"}}
    nameset:"[realintro]" {"set":{"nameSet":"false"}}
    namechecktrue:"[realintro]"
    realintro:"[intro1*nameSet*]"
    intro1true:"Wow*, YOU*, that's a huge cock you've got there! How would you like* ME* to suck it?[intro2*nameSet*]"
    intro1false:"Wow, *stockHim*, that's a huge cock you've got there! How would you like *stockHer* to suck it?[intro2*nameSet*]"
    intro2true:"Well* ME*, how about sucking it in all the way?" {"style":"Him"}
    intro2false:"Well *stockHer*, how about sucking it in all the way?" {"style":"Him"}
    
    It would be a pain, and you'd have to check separately for HIM and HER, leading to 4 of the same lines.
     
  7. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Just at the begining, or for each usage of ME and YOU? It looks like it would be for each usage, and then would make more sense to re-write or plan lines to not have the double spaces.

    Heh, Oops. Somehow missed that. Matched with pulled_up in mind is probably why. Hopefully this proves useful for someone else as well.

    D'oh! Shades of my college programming classes all over.
     
  8. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Most of the time, you can just shift asterisks about. I explained the workings of this in an earlier post somewhere else:

    As for programming classes... the checker is designed to produce "compiler-style" errors, so you'll probably have to do some interpreting of each listed issue. Sometimes (read: bugs in figuring out complex dialogues) the checker tells lies such as lines being unused, but that's only because the line that calls it has an error in it. Same thing with this parsing - it can't figure out why it can't parse it properly and then it just dies. (plonk a single accolade } { in the line and watch the checker choke on it...)
     
  9. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore dialog (university student / professor)

    Yeah, saw that posting, but since I didn't have that consideration in mind I would have to correct/rewrite that a bit.

    The thing that I don't think can be done well is a name at the beginning: Bob, how are you today?

    As for compiler style messages, yes, that was what I thought. And some of the errors the c++ threw would list one line but the problem was elsewhere, 500 lines away. At least this wont have the logic errors beyond the custom lines that never get called because you spelled the name wrong.

    Interesting to see the nameset check as well. If I get into this more I might have to run through that JSON guide.
     
  10. Xiobe

    Xiobe Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding

    Thansk a bunch for filling in the request!
     
  11. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding

    Checked the SuccubusHasLunch dialogue.

    Missing sentence ending on Line 63.
    Line 63: first_dt:"With his root I will master him"{"style":"Thought"}

    Missing sentence ending on Line 101.
    Line 101: general:"Give me your essence, manling"{"style":"Thought","mood":"Angry"}

    Typo ("sustance", should be "sustenance") on Line 137.
    Line 137: cum_in_throat:"Finally, sustance.[NORMAL_MOOD]"{"mood":"Angry","style":"Thought","next":"swallow"}

    Typo ("Sustanence", should be "Sustenance") on Line 140.
    Line 140: cum_in_throat:"Bliss! Sustanence like never before. Such energy and power he contains."{"mood":"Ahegao","style":"Thought","next":"swallow"}

    Typo ("sustance", should be "sustenance") on Line 146.
    Line 146: restart:"Such good sustance you provide* YOU*, yet I require more than the *FINISHES* you have fed me."{"mood":"Happy","check":{"feedings":"<5"}}

    Typo ("sustance", should be "sustenance") on Line 151.
    Line 151: restart:"Such good sustance you provide* YOU*. I have had enough. I will have food brought that you may recover."{"mood":"Happy","check":{"feedings":">4"},"next":"end_happy"}

    With high resistance, these lines play quite often. As a result, she's done almost by the time she got him in.
    first_throat:"Oozing already? Such a good catch you were.[swallow]"{"style":"Thought"}
    first_throat:"A taste. Such a taste.[swallow]"{"style":"Thought"}

    For me, this type (Succubi, assertive) of dialogue is the best there is, so I'd love you to continue the series.
    It also means I get quite picky as I've seen a lot of succubi manga and what not.
    A pointer that might help you:
    - Vary the vocabulary. Get as many different euphemisms or synonyms or whatever in there. Right now it's constantly about "essence" - and that's just one.
    -- Essence: Nectar, Spirit
    -- Draining: Devouring, swallowing
     
  12. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding

    I must have skipped a checkmark, since I did not get those flagged when I checked it.

    I thought I did not have enough lines and was not sure a 5 cum sequence would be enough. I'm glad you guys liked it so far though. Means work with the thesaurus (and other succubi material) will be meaningful. Kinda too bad I dont have my own for inspiration, but if I did I guess I wouldn't need it cause I wouldn't be writing this. ;D
     
  13. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding

    They're not part of the checker, I found those by hand.
     
  14. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding

    Thanks for the extra checking!

    Working on the lines more, and thinking about changing how they trigger, since I can not seem to get the RESTART lines to go. I am probably "playing the game" wrong but I found in other threads here that they do not always fire, so maybe its not me.

    Another question I have is how to check when "HE" is done cumming? I would think that is what the restart is for, but with it not always working I may need another way. What I have found is sometimes multiple cum_in_mouth or throat lines will trigger during a single cum sequence and tally up my "feedings" variable too fast.
     
  15. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid

    Two new entries, in case someone misses the edit.

    A new Succubus edit, should work better now. Feel free to grab it and look at the coding even if you already got the last one (both are up there).

    I used a variable in the cum_in_mouth and cum_in_throat lines so that they only trigger once per cum sequence. If you just use one liners it isn't a problem but I was trying to call 3 lines of dialog in sequence and sometimes they'd just run forever, and then conflict with the swallow and restart lines I was trying to use to advance the story. I also did the same on the swallow trigger, so it did not play the dialog line 3 times. I reset them in the pre_cum trigger, and that seemed to work just fine.


    I have a new story up for Xiobe's request thread found at http://www.sdtmods.com/index.php?topic=4174.msg60436#msg60436

    The story is A Rescue Repaid for his Bodyguard request.

    I left it fairly generic for request (and because it works) that pretty much any HIM / Her pairing, background or costume mod fits the dialog. It is a little chatty, since most of the triggers call a line from him and then one from her.

    It also could be used as a proof of concept for the random variable line calling that T0mcat wrote about in the Comprehensive Dialogue Guide (http://www.sdtmods.com/index.php?topic=3562.msg47716#msg47716) in the first Spoiler tag. I did it a little differently than he described, but the concept is similar enough, and that was my inspiration.
     
  16. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid

    I was checking the new Succubus edit, when I saw this line...

    Line 150: cumshot_yes"[swallowing_*FINISHES*_*gulp*]"{"style":"Thought"}
    Missing a colon to declare linename - hang on, shouldn't this be in the checker?

    So I was about to start writing a post about "use the checker pleaaaase", hauled the dialogue through the checker, copy-paste the results...
    But there weren't any results - dialogue came through clean.
    So yeah! Thanks for showing me another mistake that I can add to the checker!

    Now, for the other things...

    SuccubusHasLunch
    Checker v1.28 output:
    The linename of line 150 (cumshot_yes"[swallowing_*FINISHES*_*gulp*]"{"style") contains double quotes. Did you accidentally misplace or forget the colon?
    Line 150: cumshot_yes"[swallowing_*FINISHES*_*gulp*]"{"style":"Thought"}

    My checking:
    Line 46: resistance:"Wow you got a hot mouth."{"style":"Him"}
    I think this needs a comma: "Wow, you got a hot mouth."

    Line 48: resistance:"No uh .. no biting please"{"style":"Him"}
    Missing sentence ending (I really ought to add that one to the checker but v1 simply doesn't have the support for it... >_<)

    Line 50: first_throat:"Oozing already? Such a good catch you were.[swallow]"{"style":"Thought"}
    I still think this will play too much and mess up the nice dialogue flow you have here. Why don't you make the trigger [SWALLOW]?
    That way she'll swallow, but the lines about swallowing shouldn't play.

    Line 59: first_throat:"Such a nice member,* YOU*. I might have to keep you in better health."{"style":"Thought"}
    Output without player name set: "Such a nice member,. I might have to keep you in better health."
    Looks like a grammatical error to me. Move the comma inside the variable insertion. I'm wondering why I didn't program the checker for [,.], but I must have had some reason.

    Line 93: vigorous:"I need a more hair-triggered manling."{"style":"Thought"}
    Not a mistake, but perhaps this line is too subtle. You've got what I'd like to call a "Link-2 reference" here - basically, a reference to a reference. Hair-trigger refers to the pressure needed to set off the trigger of a gun (the pressure would be that of a single hair), and then the gun refers to his... member.
    Hair-trigger -> Required effort to fire -> Required effort to make him ejaculate = 2 links
    You can either replace the reference with a Link-1 reference or leave it as it is.

    Line 110: general:"Give me your spend, manling"{"style":"Thought"}
    Missing sentence ending.

    Line 144: drool:"Such bountiful food* YOU*. It overflows.[swallow]"{"style":"Him"}
    Wrong actor. Don't let them read each other's autocues!
    Also, [swallow] -> [SWALLOW], maybe.

    Line 185: swallowing_3_down:"... is not so bad now. I hope this tastes as good as you feel, because you taste mahvelous*, YOU*.[AHEGAO_MOOD][feedcheck_*FINISHES*]"{"style":"Thought","set":{"feedings":"+1"}}
    Was this typo ("mahvelous") intended? It seems vocally correct.
    If not, "mahvelous" -> "marvelous"

    Line 186: swallowing_3_down:"... is not so bad now. Did I please you*, YOU*. You certainly give me great pleasure.[AHEGAO_MOOD][feedcheck_*FINISHES*]"{"style":"Thought","set":{"feedings":"+1"}}
    "Did I please you*, YOU*." seems like a question to me.
    Maybe change it so that it ends with a question mark?

    Line 203; feedcheck_1:"You are not done yet, manling. Just *FINISHES* is only a snack."{"style":"Thought","set":{"gulp":"yes"}}
    204; feedcheck_2:"You must feed me again, manling. I require more than just *FINISHES*."{"style":"Thought","set":{"gulp":"yes"}}
    205; feedcheck_3:"Such good sustenance you provide* YOU*, yet I hunger for more than the *FINISHES* you have fed me."{"style":"Thought","set":{"gulp":"yes"}}
    and 206: feedcheck_4:"I must have more of you* YOU*, so sweet is your gift but *FINISHES* times is not enough."{"style":"Thought","set":{"gulp":"yes"}}
    Do you need *FINISHES* in there? You technically already know the number.

    Line 217: end_angry:"As the demon leaves, tail swishing more sedately, her parting words echo in the hall."{"style":"Him","next":"end_angry_1"}
    Unreachable line via normal play.
    The only way to reach this line is to achieve 5 feedings, and have an angry mood.
    The third feeding sets her mood to AHEGAO, and the dialogue does not contain any mood altering lines that are accessible with the ahegao mood after the 3rd feeding.
    (This is the kind of stuff that I want to add to the V2 Checker. Imagine...)

    Line 220: end_normal:"The demon leaves, her tail swishing with a satisfied motion. You hear an exchange of voices down the hall."{"style":"Him","next":"end_normal_1"}
    Unreachable line via normal play.
    The only way to reach this line is to achieve 5 feedings, and have a normal mood.
    The third feeding sets her mood to AHEGAO, and the dialogue does not contain any mood altering lines that are accessible with the ahegao mood after the 3rd feeding.

    Line 223: end_happy:"You hear the demon calling to another servant as she leaves the cage, ordering him (it?) to bring you a human meal."{"style":"Him","next":"end_happy_1"}
    Unreachable line via normal play.
    The only way to reach this line is to achieve 5 feedings, and have a happy mood.
    The third feeding sets her mood to AHEGAO, and the dialogue does not contain any mood altering lines that are accessible with the ahegao mood after the 3rd feeding.

    A Rescue Repaid
    Checker v1.28 gives clean report.

    Line 25: intro_start:"A dialog between Our Hero and his Damsel in Distress%0AAfter he has rescued her from a (zombie invasion | avalanche | mugging | assassination | vampire attack | bad hair day) she wishes to thank her rescuer while they are in a safe place.[intro2]"{"style":"Him"}
    Line 26: intro2:"The setup has them in a room in a (cave | house | spaceship | wooded glade | someplace safe). She walked up to him, yanked open his pants and THEN introduced herself.[intro_housemate]"{"style":"Him","set":{"opening":"housemate"}}
    Is this (that | those lines | alternative options) cheesy dialogue, or left over development snippets? What do you expect the user to do with it, if anything?

    Line 31: intro_payback:"You saved my life, so I'm your *mood*, *adjective*, *noun* until its safe to leave.[hislines_*adjective*]"
    I can't help but chuckle as I read these lines without filling in the blanks. Simply by not filling in these variables, you have made one of the cheesiest dialogues ever. Ahaha.
    Right. "until its safe" -> "until it's safe"

    Line 70: herlines_happy:"I am so lucky he was there when he was. I'm *mood* to pay him back as his *noun*.[mood_switcher]"{"style":"Thought"}
    Literal meaning of first sentence: "I am so lucky he was there when he existed."
    I'm not sure that's what you meant.

    Line 91: wake:"*YOU, *... you made me pass out!"{"style":"Him"}
    Is he anemic?

    Line 101: cum_in_throat:"Right down my *noun* throat"{"style":"Thought"}
    Line 102: cum_in_throat:"Like a good *noun* ... right down your throat"{"style":"Him"}
    Missing sentence ending.

    Line 110: cough:"-aghck"{"style":"Thought"}
    Line 111: cough:"-aghck"{"style":"Him"}
    That's not how coughing works, I'm afraid.
    Cough lines are inserted in the dialogue when the girl coughs. This interrupts the dialogue temporarily and inserts this string. I've never seen dialogues with style attributes for cough lines before...
     
  17. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid

    Thanks for catching all my misplaced commas, questions without ? marks, wrong ME/YOU variables and such.

    Remarks on Succubus:

    That is a grammatical form, and is usually correct. However I did not intend a pause there. He isn't ejecting "Wow!" and then declaring "You got a hot mouth." but saying it all together.


    Missed taking out the [swallow] trigger in the last edit. I had that in there in the prior script but with the way I changed things it does not work anymore. I should probably also move it to a pre_cum line instead.


    Yeah, misplaced the comma. I did that a couple other places. Not quite up to catching those myself yet. I don't mind providing test fodder either. ;-)

    I did not know they actually had a name for that. I had it as "more compliant manling" before. Realized that really didn't work, and changed it to this. I guess its problem of knowing what I meant.


    Yeah, I meant that. At 3 she's getting a little happier and develops an accent.



    I know the number, someone reading the code does, but someone playing it won't. May not be needed, really, but having some kind of progress indicator seems fitting to me... at least in a "game" with an "end".

    I pretty much kept the ending block from some of the earliest versions, and while unlikely (and I'm thinking about trying it now that you point it out) if you cum on her face she will drop a mood level.
    If I understand how things work and have coded it correctly, you could cum in her mouth twice and then on her face the next three times and drop to angry. Plus being something of a completionist, I wanted to have something for each condition. The intended ending got the most work though.


    Remarks on Rescue:


    The | bars are supposed to indicate OR options. I suppose this kinda thing could be in comments or on the forum for the user to read, and not need to be in the game. Potentially cheesy too, but that wasn't really the intention.

    I struggled more with trying to come up with lines that would fit and whether to go from a random noun to a random adjective or the other way, in the exchanges between him and her, than "good" dialog. Guess I'll take whatever accolades I get.
    I really had Proof of Concept on my mind more at first, then developed it into something that could fit the request. Glad you found it funny at least.


    And this is why we need editors. What I had in mind is that he was there in the area when she needed help, and she was lucky that someone was able to help her when she needed it. Maybe rewording it to: I am so lucky he was there when I needed him? -or- I am so lucky he wasn't there five minutes later?

    Had to think and then check WAKE comment. Turns out these are just victims of me taking a line and copying it three times, then dropping on a style so I had one of each without even thinking about it.
    Cough, interrupt, and a couple other blocks like that I just copy over from a stock one that I should probably FIX now that I'm doing enough of these.
     
  18. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid

    I'd suggest the first one.

    Hmm... Sorry for the comments like "Is he anemic?", though. That didn't really tell you what was wrong.

    And as for what I dubbed a "Link-2 reference" - that's not an official term, but I don't know the official term for it anyway. At least it's easy to explain what it means.
     
  19. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    Re: Grade Whore (univ student + professor) // Succubus Feeding // A Rescue Repaid

    I'll make that change for the next (3rd) version. I posted an otherwise corrected one earlier.

    I got the anemic problem fast enough, probably because I realized he wasn't supposed to be passing out.

    Now I just need a better conversation to fit my randomized words code. I wanted to find a way to use it in the dialog and not just finishers, or short one liners like T0mcat put together to explain the idea.
     
  20. karlpaws

    karlpaws Potential Patron

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    New dialog up. Still working at the other two.. have a new succubus version almost done. Changing some of the wording around, making her more in charge.

    Pim_gd

    I'm really liking your v2 checker. The problem comments are more detailed, even though I'm not sure if the grammar stuff involving spaces if *ME* is missing are right. Can you not have the girl's name entered?