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Ruin Over Valendia (Princess Crown)

Discussion in 'Fiction' started by Cloister, Aug 8, 2012.

  1. Cloister

    Cloister Guest

    Author's Note: I'd like to thank everyone who enjoyed the Super Metroid story and left a comment. Because I've done that thing again where after I write about a fairly well known subject, I go and write a story about an obscure character that only I will probably enjoy. But I can't help it. There's an action RPG game called Princess Crown (that was only released in Japan) from a company called Vanillaware (they also did Odin Sphere and Muramasa) that is known for a lot of pretty, well detailed sprites. Their main characters are usually royalty with great character designs sometimes involving elaborate outfits. The character in this story is a queen named Elfaran (I think) that appears in the introduction and a few other parts of the game. A minor role to be sure.

    I looked at a few translation guides and summaries to come up with this story, but I've still taken a few liberties with the motivations and history. For the most part it's a fairly routine fantasy story about good vs. evil where you play as a small princess that uses an over sized sword. But I wanted to see tragedy befall her heroic mother, because failed prophecies and losing fated duels are some of my weaknesses when it comes to even the most cliche fantasies. Enjoy, hopefully.

    Screenshot Sources: Google Search


    Ruin Over Valendia

    Once upon a time in a land far, far away in the Kingdom of Valendia...

    Queen Elfaran sat upon her throne and patiently listened to the concerns of her people. In a land of dragons and magic, there was no shortage of threats to her realm. But despite the dangers, her kingdom enjoyed an age of peace and prosperity unmatched in its long history. The death of her husband, the king, had driven her to secure a future free of war or demons. The day-to-day problems never ceased, but she was a ruler committed to her duties.

    Giving her subjects an audience in her throne room was a long and taxing session, but her old friend and court wizard of Valendia, Jestonai, was there to help her. She did not cease until the last person went home and issued commands to her knights and vassals as the situation demanded. A queen’s work was never done. But despite her calm outward expression, she wrestled with dread nestled deep in her heart.

    The future was clouded by a black shadow she was all too aware of. Jestonai had a vision of a demon that would attack her kingdom to claim her royal blood. The monster would use it to revive ages old evil in the form of the Demon King, something her long line of ancestors were believed to be responsible for banishing. Whether a prophecy or a vision of the future, she trusted her friend completely. The prosperous days of Valendia would not last forever. This she knew.

    “The dreaded day draws closer, your highness.” Jestonai reminded her as she headed back to her chambers.

    She kept a brave face. “I am aware. The necessary precautions have all been taken. Now we can only wait.”

    “I am confident the spell I researched from the tales of your ancestors has the power to banish the demon. But the enchantment only works on your royal sword.” The old wizard stroked his beard knowing the danger. “Only you can deliver the decisive blow as Queen of Valendia.”

    “So be it.” She took a breath and steeled herself. “I will not miss.”

    The demon would come for her specifically. Something that brought a mix of emotions, dread and relief. It would not waste time slaughtering her people, but it would not stop coming for her until it was vanquished or claimed her blood. If it succeeded, her kingdom would not survive the revival of the Demon King. It would be too late if it came to that.

    “Then I will retire to my study. I will be ready as well. May good dreams find you in your sleep, your majesty.”

    Jestonai went his separate ways as she entered the royal bedroom. The demon would come any day now. Queen Elfaran found herself hovering over a large dresser in the corner. She opened it up to find her royal armor and sword polished and readied for war. While the sword had been in her family for generations, the armor was prepared by the kingdom’s best smiths in secret. She did not want to worry her people. It would be her fight. Only she would decide victory or defeat.

    She closed the dresser. As queen, she could not afford to consider the possibility of failure.


    Queen Eflaran, clad in her armor, clutched her sword tightly and took a deep breath. The dreaded day had arrived. In the dead of night, fire and terror spread through her castle. The knights of her realm rushed to defense while Jestonai prepared the spell in her throne room. In the main hall ahead of them, the sound of a one-sided battle sounded in the distance, moving ever closer. She knew her knights would not be enough to stop the demon. But as senseless as their deaths seemed, they needed as much time as they could get.

    “Your majesty... I am almost ready.” He informed her.

    Elfaran and the dozen knights standing close to protect her jumped at the devilish voice that screamed through the castle.

    “Where is your queen? I must have her blood to revive the Demon King! Your ants will not stand in my way!”

    The sound of metal cutting through meat signaled another round of desperate screams from her knights. The demon was getting closer. Elfaran did not show fear. She had readied herself for this showdown. Nothing could break her focus at this point.

    “Where is your queen?” The demon boomed again.

    The doors to the throne room blew off their hinges with a fire storm. The demon entered unabated. The hideous blue creature stalked forward with twisted razor sharp claws. Its face was white like a skull and his tail like a scorpion radiated malevolence. Jestonai was not ready yet. Elfaran’s knights charged forward to defend their queen but were quickly cut down with a torrent of fire that erupted from the demon’s mouth. They were swept away and left as charred corpses.

    Nothing lie between the demon and Queen Elfaran.

    “Now your highness! Take the power to destroy this creature!”

    Elfaran raised her sword and the pointed steel blade burned gold with the power to slice through any monster threatening her kingdom. The demon was unimpressed, flicking a long red tongue in disgust.

    “Blarrrh! Is this the limit of your power?”

    “Enough!” Elfaran shouted. “I will strike you down for the death and suffering you have brought to my lands!”

    With Jestonai’s work done, Elfaran entered battle with the demon. The creature moved with a light step that surprised her, but she had trained long enough with her armor that it did not slow her down. Her cape swirled as she swung her sword to and fro. As boisterous as the demon appeared it was careful not to come within close with her blade. She thrust forward and the demon contorted its body to steer clear of her weapon.

    Tired of her offensive, the demon brought out its claws and swiped the air intent on drawing her blood. She blocked with her sword and the force from the blow made her slide back several feet with a thunderous clang. The demon pressed its attack, striking her sword again and almost knocked her off balance. Elfaran was dangerously close to being overpowered but manage to recover with a quick step and an elegant spin. In seconds she had her sword ready and raised it up, prepared to bring it down like a hammer.

    The demon jumped back and Elfaran’s swift strike missed. Her determination faltered slightly as the creature charged to punish her failure. It brought down both its claws on her, but she brought up her sword with both arms to catch its hands. They wrestled with each other in a power struggle. The queen versus the demon. A struggle she knew she would lose if she did not break free quickly. Her strain was visible as she grit her teeth and used all her strength to push back.

    That’s when the demon spit in her face with a putrid black and red substance. It stung her eyes and ran down her face, entering her nose and mouth.

    “Gaaaugh! Aacck!” Elfaran choked on the foul demon spit.

    It burned her mouth and nearly blinded her. She knew that she had been poisoned. The demon knocked her back and landed three crushing blows to her body. One. Two. Three. It rattled her entire being and almost launched her across the throne room, but the armor she wore held against the punishing assault. Jestonai came to the rescue and cast a spell to dull the effect of the foul poison spit she had accidentally inhaled. The battle was not lost yet.

    “Your highness! Are you alright?” Jestonai cried helplessly.

    “I am not yet defeated!” Elfaran coughed. “I stand yet!”

    She could tell even on the twisted demon’s face that it was enraged she had recovered. Its body flared up. Its skin momentarily turned red.

    “Enough of this! I will have your blood!” The demon cried.

    Elfaran readied her sword. “You will have nothing!”

    The queen and the demon charged at each other intent on ending the fight. They waited until the last moment before striking and moved with such speed it was as if they passed through each other.

    Elfaran swung her sword with a swift effortless motion as the demon raked the air with its brutal claws. Jestonai was at a loss, unable to tell the outcome of their duel as the queen and the demon ended up facing away from each other.

    The queen made the first move, breaking her pose to glance over her shoulder. In that moment the terrible truth dawned on her. The determination on her face shattered. She had missed. The demon had made the final blow and her senses were just finally catching up. Pain overtook her entire body as a hundred blows landed all at once. So strong and relentless that it lifted her off the ground as her body convulsed from the demon’s furious attack. No armor in the land could protect her now.

    The court wizard could see the despair on her face and felt it himself. It was impossible for Elfaran to escape such a powerful blow. Just when it seemed like the agonizing scene came to an end, a large gash appeared on her chest plate. The demon cut with enough force to draw blood and Elfaran felt it deep in her soul. The battle was lost.

    “Unngh! AAaaaauauuuughhhhhhh!” She let out a guttural scream.

    Finally she landed on her feet and stumbled once before dropping to her knees and collapsing to her side. The great queen of Valendia could stand no more. She grasped her chest and saw the blood on her gauntlets.

    “...impossible... It can’t be true...” She gasped.

    The demon hovered over her fallen from and grabbed her by the neck, lifting her off the ground. All her strength had been beaten out of her. Struggling was out of the question. Her arms dangled at her sides while her legs hung loosely in the air.

    “Bragh! You have fallen, and your kingdom will follow! Queen or peasant, it doesn’t matter! Your miserable fate is sealed!”

    Jestonai could watch no more. He ran forward to try and save her, but the demon easily cut him down with one swipe of its awful claws. Elfaran recoiled at the sound of her trusted friend crying out in pain before silenced forever. She grit her teeth. It was all she could do to resist the despair welling up in her chest. The demon wiped her blood across its claws and then dropped her on the floor like a sack of flour.

    “The Demon King will see your kingdom burned down to the last soul!” The demon cackled.

    Queen Elfaran crumpled on the red carpet, struggling for breath. The demon made off with her royal blood. If the wound did not kill her, the darkness poised to overwhelm her lands would finish the job. Sorrow took her, not because of her inevitable demise, but for failing her kingdom. A prayer escaped her lips from the horrible realization.

    “The demon... struck me down... forgive me...”

    Elfaran felt herself fade away. Whether it was unconsciousness or death she could not be sure.... it would not matter now...
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 9, 2013
  2. monstarkook

    monstarkook Ryonani Teamster

    Mar 15, 2012
    Likes Received:
    I have no idea what the source material is, but it must be pretty dang good to have inspired this wonderful little tale. I really like your writing style and use of description with clever word choice. The dialogue seemed a bit forced to me in parts, but that might just be because I don't know the source material at all! That said, I do love that studio and the games they put out.

    So yeah, overall pretty enjoyable! Your style is very vivid and dynamic here, much like in your Samus story. It's very easy to visualize. I'll have to see if I can find a way to play this game at some point.

    (If I may, could I suggest an Odin Sphere story about Gwendolyn? You mentioned that game, so if you're familiar with it I'm sure you could knock it out of the park. I really enjoyed Odin Sphere myself, and Gwendolyn is a terrifically designed character. Just a thought!)
  3. Cloister

    Cloister Guest

    Yeah, the dialogue came out pretty rough. Mostly because I don't know how these characters talk or what they're personalities are at all. As for your Odin Sphere request... I'm sure I could cook up something. I agree that Gwendolyn is pretty cool. Is there anything specific you want to see out of it?

    Thanks for the comment!
  4. monstarkook

    monstarkook Ryonani Teamster

    Mar 15, 2012
    Likes Received:
    Nah, nothing in particular! Just make it humiliating and agonizing and let your imagination rooaaam. Your stuff is great man, I'm sure I'll like whatever you can concoct.