rwby dialogue (1 Viewer)

oldwalkers

Potential Patron
Joined
Feb 3, 2015
so ruby saw in blakes "books" that there is something even better than cookies, but how to ask? How about everyone's favourite bloned knight!.

(beta leave complainants, and constrictive criticism!!!)
(noted some slight errors adjusted them
 

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ruby x jaune.txt
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ruby x jaune v 2.txt
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Pim_gd

Content Creator
Joined
Jan 25, 2013
You should use the dialogue checker to check for errors - it will help you figure out why your dialogue doesn't work in certain places. At the very least, it opens up the stage for more constructive criticism, right now all I can say is fix the spelling, fix the syntax.

DialogueChecker v3.02dev output, filtered to ignore grammar:
Dialogue was checked in 55 ms with v3.02dev of the DialogueChecker.
I found 30 issue(s) with your dialogue, of which 0 were severe, 29 were major issues, and 1 were minor issues.

Variables - Major: Unused variable ("played") in initial_settings line, linenumber 3, col 18, near "initial_settings:{"played":"false"}".
Line 3: initial_settings:{"played":"false"}

Syntax - Major: Double trigger opener on line 7, col 21 near "geN7:"[RELEASE][HOLD][[RELEASE][WINCE][ADD_TEARS]fuck (...)"
Line 7: geN7:"[RELEASE][HOLD][[RELEASE][WINCE][ADD_TEARS]fuck ruby i cant stop. you feel so good!!! [geN8]"{"style":"Him"}

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 7. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 7: geN7:"[RELEASE][HOLD][[RELEASE][WINCE][ADD_TEARS]fuck ruby i cant stop. you feel so good!!! [geN8]"{"style":"Him"}

Syntax - Major: Probable nested triggers on line 7, col 22. This indicates a coding error.
Line 7: geN7:"[RELEASE][HOLD][[RELEASE][WINCE][ADD_TEARS]fuck ruby i cant stop. you feel so good!!! [geN8]"{"style":"Him"}

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([[RELEASE]) on line 7 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 7: geN7:"[RELEASE][HOLD][[RELEASE][WINCE][ADD_TEARS]fuck ruby i cant stop. you feel so good!!! [geN8]"{"style":"Him"}

Syntax - Major: Double trigger opener on line 25, col 126 near "(...) [[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]L,[introa2]""
Line 25: intro:" [HAPPY_MOOD]Hey jaune! [LOOK_DOWN] WOW its even begger than i thought ! hmm...blakes book said that guys like this... [[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]L,[introa2]"

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 25. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 25: intro:" [HAPPY_MOOD]Hey jaune! [LOOK_DOWN] WOW its even begger than i thought ! hmm...blakes book said that guys like this... [[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]L,[introa2]"

Syntax - Major: Probable nested triggers on line 25, col 127. This indicates a coding error.
Line 25: intro:" [HAPPY_MOOD]Hey jaune! [LOOK_DOWN] WOW its even begger than i thought ! hmm...blakes book said that guys like this... [[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]L,[introa2]"

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]) on line 25 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 25: intro:" [HAPPY_MOOD]Hey jaune! [LOOK_DOWN] WOW its even begger than i thought ! hmm...blakes book said that guys like this... [[LEFT_ARM_HAND_JOB]L,[introa2]"

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([introb2]) on line 26 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 26: intro:"[NORMAL_MOOD][LOOK_UP] R-Ruby what are you?AW no ruby stop! [introb2]. "{"style":"Him"}

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of asterisks was found on line 52. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 52: lick_penis:"*douse this feel good.?....."

Variables - Major: Undeclared variable ("douse this feel good.?....."") in a variable insertion (*douse this feel good.?....."*) on line 52, col -1, near "Can't create snippet - parsing error".
Line 52: lick_penis:"*douse this feel good.?....."

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 150. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 150: pulled_up:"[NORMAL_MOOD]You keep looking at my breasts do-do you like them? yes?[HAPPY_MOOD] YAY!.["

Line Usage - Major: A trigger (["]) on line 150 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 150: pulled_up:"[NORMAL_MOOD]You keep looking at my breasts do-do you like them? yes?[HAPPY_MOOD] YAY!.["

Syntax - Major: Double trigger opener on line 159, col 37 near "(...) goood[[ARMS_HIS_LEGS],...... (...)"
Line 159: introa4:"jaune.....you taste so goood[[ARMS_HIS_LEGS],...... i need more...heheheh [AHEGAO_MOOD][OPEN_EYES][LOOK_UP][DROOL] [introa5]"

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 159. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 159: introa4:"jaune.....you taste so goood[[ARMS_HIS_LEGS],...... i need more...heheheh [AHEGAO_MOOD][OPEN_EYES][LOOK_UP][DROOL] [introa5]"

Syntax - Major: Probable nested triggers on line 159, col 38. This indicates a coding error.
Line 159: introa4:"jaune.....you taste so goood[[ARMS_HIS_LEGS],...... i need more...heheheh [AHEGAO_MOOD][OPEN_EYES][LOOK_UP][DROOL] [introa5]"

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([[ARMS_HIS_LEGS]) on line 159 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 159: introa4:"jaune.....you taste so goood[[ARMS_HIS_LEGS],...... i need more...heheheh [AHEGAO_MOOD][OPEN_EYES][LOOK_UP][DROOL] [introa5]"

Syntax - Major: Double trigger opener on line 175, col 50 near "(...)ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL](...)"
Line 175: introa2:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL] (It it it's so hot ... it smells so....gooood and[SWALLOW] it tastes even better than cookie dough I-i- need more now!) [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] [introa3]"{"style":"Thought"}

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 175. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 175: introa2:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL] (It it it's so hot ... it smells so....gooood and[SWALLOW] it tastes even better than cookie dough I-i- need more now!) [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] [introa3]"{"style":"Thought"}

Syntax - Major: Probable nested triggers on line 175, col 51. This indicates a coding error.
Line 175: introa2:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL] (It it it's so hot ... it smells so....gooood and[SWALLOW] it tastes even better than cookie dough I-i- need more now!) [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] [introa3]"{"style":"Thought"}

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([[BLINK]) on line 175 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 175: introa2:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL] (It it it's so hot ... it smells so....gooood and[SWALLOW] it tastes even better than cookie dough I-i- need more now!) [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] [introa3]"{"style":"Thought"}

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([[OPEN_EYES]) on line 175 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 175: introa2:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS][EJACULATE][AHEGAO_MOOD]AW[[BLINK][LOOK_UP][[OPEN_EYES][DROOL][DROOL] (It it it's so hot ... it smells so....gooood and[SWALLOW] it tastes even better than cookie dough I-i- need more now!) [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] [introa3]"{"style":"Thought"}

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([introa9]) on line 180 refers to a non-existing line.
Line 180: introa8:"Yay! now...um how do i?, um jaune can you tell me how to? ive never done this before[HOLD][DROOL].[introa9] "

Line Usage - Major: Line 201 is unused!
Line 201: cof3:"[CLOSE_EYES][ADD_TEARS] Im never letting this end."{"style":"Thought"}

Syntax - Minor: Empty trigger on line 261, col 78. near "(...) tale.[] (...)"
Whilst there's not wrong with empty triggers, you should not use empty triggers to trigger lines without linenames.
Lines without linenames cannot be triggered by the 'next' line-attribute.
Line 261: finish7:"IHehehe you feel so good![AHEGAO_MOOD] feels like im in a fairy tale.[] This, . Seven times! i Is this what it feels like to be loved."

Line Usage - Major: A trigger ([]) on line 261 refers to a non-existing line.
Empty triggers will trigger a line without a linename. The use of lines without a linename is possible, but very bad coding/writing style.
It's also possible that you accidentally cut a trigger short. Take a good look at the line.
Line 261: finish7:"IHehehe you feel so good![AHEGAO_MOOD] feels like im in a fairy tale.[] This, . Seven times! i Is this what it feels like to be loved."

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing {} was found on line 262. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 262: finish8:" [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] IM NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU ENY {MORE LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]."

Syntax - Major: An uneven amount of opening and closing [] was found on line 262. This could indicate a coding error.
Line 262: finish8:" [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] IM NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU ENY {MORE LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]."

Syntax - Major: Missing trigger start of a trigger on line 262, col 97. This indicates a coding error.
Line 262: finish8:" [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] IM NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU ENY {MORE LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]."

Once you've fixed these issues, try letting me look your dialogue over again. Maybe I'll find something new.
 
A

Azriel

Hey i manually spell checked the file (because the mistakes bugs me when im playing) so here is the file, also at the end of the page (finisher 8) I think there might be a code error but im not sure. Here is the line: finish8:" [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] IM NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU ANY {MORE LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]."
 

Attachments

ruby x jaune v 2.txt
20.1 KB · Views: 483

Nachtwache

Potential Patron
Joined
Nov 27, 2015
Should probably be
finish8:" [ARMS_HIS_LEGS] IM NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT YOU ANY MORE [LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]."
 

Pim_gd

Content Creator
Joined
Jan 25, 2013
Better would be finish8:"[ARMS_HIS_LEGS]I'M NEVER GIVING YOU TO WIESS, I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU ANY MORE[LOOK_UP][AHEGAO_MOOD]." but okay (You don't want those spaces messing things up)
 

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