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Perverted tsundere bitch

Discussion in 'Dialogue' started by TetsuyaHikari, May 12, 2013.

  1. TetsuyaHikari

    TetsuyaHikari Avid Affiliate

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    Okay, so it seems I've been out of the game for a while and there have been different moods added to scripts now. I only became aware of this just minutes before posting this, so my script is still using the old method, like I used in previous scripts with ten lines per situation. Maybe I'll take a look at some newer scripts later and use one of them as a template so I can make something more complicated, but for now... Let's just kick it old school~!

    This script was built with Kirino Kousaka in mind, so it can be played with her as a model, however... It can also be used even without her as the model. Just bear in mind, this script will contain a lot of insulting such as, "idiot", "dummy", "moron", "pervert", etc. So, if that isn't your cup of tea, then you most certainly will want to pass on this, heh. Also, it should be noted that I have chosen to censor her age and grade in the script through the use of 'XX' since this is quite common in doujinshi (XX or OO works).

    I have done this for obvious reasons, which I will not explain here. If you wish to change them to fit your own mood, then go for it, but I will be leaving it as-is, even if there are new renditions made for this script in the future (which I don't currently foresee, but who knows). She will also address you as "brother" in a few of the lines. I was going to go with, "Onii-chan", but I think "brother" is a more known and accepted term around these parts and I didn't want to go over-the-top weeaboo with the script.

    In any case, if you do have a masochistic side and enjoy the thought of a 'little sister' figure blowing your cock while addressing you as a "stupid pervert" and the like, then this would certainly be for you. I'm not familiar with the new settings and such since I haven't actually played SDT in a long time, but I would say go with these settings for this one:

    1. Make sure her hands are placed on his thighs.
    2. Place his hand onto the back of her head.
    2. Crank the throat resistance up to at least 75% or so. It is her first blowjob after all.
    3. The script rewards roughness, so feel free to go to town on her, heh.

    About halfway into the scene though, you will begin to see more "~" and "<3" signs to show her tone is changing. She will essentially start out as just a bitch with tsundere tendencies, but as you continue to play with her, you will help her feel more comfortable and expose her perverted side, so it essentially turns into a mind break situation (especially towards the end when there are hearts pretty much in every sentence since she can't help but have a loving tone due to you "breaking her in" per se).

    Anyway! I know it's been a while since I've posted anything, but I hope you guys enjoy it and I'll try to make something more complicated after looking over the layout of the new scripts.

    EDIT: Very minor edit, but I noticed a comma was missing in a line towards the end, so I re-uploaded it.
     

    Attached Files:

  2. Shybear

    Shybear Potential Patron

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    Nice work. Good Tsundere lines for sure.

    You could add a few Mood change triggers or arm movements just to give it a little more life.. especially as she's starting to enjoy herself towards the end. Her mood swinging from Normal to Happy would be appropriate but it still plays very well as a vanilla dialogue without too many fancy features. Just a nice simple script.

    Plays really well with Kirino as the character for sure.
    I'm sure you already have this but i feel that posting this here for others is a good idea... Mineur's Imports has an excellent Kirino Hair import.
     
  3. TetsuyaHikari

    TetsuyaHikari Avid Affiliate

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    Yeeeeeeah... I didn't really know about the mood stuff when I was writing it, lol. I wasn't aware the game had went through so many revisions and included this feature as part of the dialogue now. I was just using an old script as a template, but I'm glad it still works properly ;w;
     
  4. Bipolarized

    Bipolarized Potential Patron

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    Glad to have you back! You wrote some of my favorite dialogues, so I can't wait to see what you can do with the new system.
     
  5. Ultimadrago

    Ultimadrago Potential Patron

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    Welcome back Tetsuya!

    I have been a silent fan of your dialogue work, but had to drop in to tell you myself. The work and care that you put into your audiologues and text is something to be applauded by all that use this program. I really hope you do bless us with a new dialogue every once in a while because it's some of the best work on the site. (I say this in no means to undervalue the vast amount of work from others, but I've read and listened to enough in feeling very comfortable making such a statement.)
     
  6. Pim_gd

    Pim_gd Swell Supporter

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    I've been fixing old dialogues with the DialogueChecker as people post that they like the dialogue.
    So I fixed this one as well.

    Issues fixed:
    I found 5 issue(s) with your dialogue, of which 0 were severe.
    Grammatical error (double sentence ending: .!) on line 25, col 66 near "(...) know..!""
    Line 25: resistance:"Don't go so hard, idiot! It's k-kind of big, you know..!"

    Grammatical error (space before question mark) on line 31, col 42 near "(...) wider" ?! (...)"
    Line 31: resistance:"What do you mean, "open wider" ?! Why does it have to be so big anyway? Geez, you're such a pervert!"

    A substitution (variable insertion) is attempted with an undefined variable (cough) on line 41.
    Are you perhaps using asterisks (*) to indicate actions? You should replace the asterisks with %2A. Otherwise SDT will try to insert an undefined variable, leading to blanks in your dialogue.
    Line 41: cough:"*cough*"

    Line 75 is unused!
    Line 75: Wake:"I... I had the weirdest dream, brother. I thought you were-wait... It wasn't a dream at all! Wh-what are you doing to me, you stupid pervert?!"

    Grammatical error (double sentence ending: .!) on line 109, col 51 near "(...) much..! (...)"
    Line 109: cum_on_face:"I never knew guys could c-cum so much..! This... This stupid perverted cock of yours is amazing~<3"
     

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